pg. 8
SOME
WEDNESDAYS WHEN she met Lloyd, Alba would be very
tense.
Full of doubts. What was she doing? It didn’t mean anything? Or did it? She was
confused, lately she felt she cared for him, really cared. Oh! all those
contrary feelings.
Lloyd
knew how to handle it. He would make small talk. At moments touching on serious
subjects, then a joke or two and he would talk stealing sideway glances at her
to gauge her mood till she started to relax. Then smiling into her eyes as if
to ask her permission he would take her hands, kiss them, pull her to him….
He
liked her. He really cared for her. He had told her he loved her. He had said
as much. He murmured in her ear often, I love you, Alba. He called her
everyday. Several times a day. Day and night. He showered her with lovely
gifts: a deluxe edition of English-Spanish dictionary. Jewelry. A TV set. And
he was interested in everything she did. So kind, gentle, good looking,
passionate. Yes. And married with two children.
So
she knew. Didn’t need to ask herself, why?? She brought it up. Softly, more as
thinking out loud….
He
listened. Paid attention. Invited her to brunch the following Sunday at his
Club. Took her swimming at a lovely Country Club in the Peninsula. They went
dancing. But it was too late. The combination of her new financial
independence, her relationship with Bert. The uneasy feeling that never left
her was growing and growing in her.
THE
FOLLOWING WEEK Lloyd’s office was full of sunshine. The aroma of coffee and
fresh pastry, so enticing. But he wasn’t his usual confident self. They had
been talking in previous days of their relationship. This is not going to ever
go any place, Alba softly.
A
dark shadow of pain darkened his green eyes.
Alba’s
filled with tears. She had not imagine the pain she was feeling. The room
became dark, she was trying to contain the tears that were
pg. 9
spilling
down her cheeks. They turned in passionate embrace toward each other. My darling,
my love, Lloyd cried out. Their love making was savage. They exploded into one
another. They climaxed together.
Lloyd
didn’t say anything to let her know he knew she was seeing someone else. He was
silent. It was obvious to Alba he was giving her a chance to talk to him.
She
did: It has been wonderful, magicaI but need time to study, you know I
have enrolled at State. She looked up, he was watching her. A look of relief in
his eyes. Thankful she was being discreet. He smiled.
Alba
smiled. She smiled broadly, lovingly. She had not realized
how
much this was going to hurt. Tears rolled down her cheeks again….
ALBA
CONTINUED TO see Bert and they had fun together. They enjoyed movies, ethnic
restaurants, drives down the coast. A plus was that their love making was
so very good. He encouraged her to buy underwear at Fredericks of Hollywood
downtown which specialized in unusual, bawdy pieces, panties with a slit
in the crotch. Oh yes! he would moan. Extra friction….Oh, Yes. Yes. They found
they enjoyed talking, really talking to one another. One day he mentioned he
was thirty-three. And she realized he didn’t know her age…She found him staring
at her, his face distorted by an expression of disbelief.
You
are forty-nine? He managed. Then to his credit,
he smiled. His expression softened again. But immediately he looked away
averting her eyes. From then on their relationship cooled down. He took
to mentioning often, how much his aging mother wanted grandchildren. Alba took
the hint. Exasperated, one day, she told him, Well, I had a tubal ligation…
Bert,
looked at her. His face a big question mark? ? ?
Too blunt? Better she should hv lied? What now, Alba wondered……...?
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